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Inglourious Basterds (Lt. Aldo Rain)

Scene: Aldo has an idea how they can sneak into the movie theater for Operation Kino: Impersonate themselves as italian filmmakers.

Lt. Aldo Rain: “Well, I speak the most Italian so I’ll be your escort. Donowitz speaks the second most so he’ll be your Italian cameraman. Omar speaks third most so he’ll be Donny’s assistant.”
Omar Ulmer: “But I don’t speak Italian.”
Lt. Aldo Rain: “Like I said: third best. Just keep your fuckin’ mouth shut. In fact why don’t you start practicing right now?”

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The Devil’s Advocate (John Milton)

Scene: Kevin just found out about John’s secret identity (devil) and asks him questions about life.

Kevin Lomax: “But what about love?”
John Milton: “Overrated! Biochemically no different than eating large quantities of chocolate.”

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Heroes (Sylar)

Episode: S3.21 Into Asylum
Scene: Sylar explains Emile why he is always trying to get new abilities.

Sylar: “Why does anyone want power? To screw with people? Or to simply screw people?”

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Heroes (Sylar)

Episode: S3.18 Exposed
Scene: Sylar is holding Luke to the Wall and beginning to cut his head open.

Luke (screaming): “Why are you doing this to me?”
Sylar: “Because you’re here and I need to express my feelings. You used me for some joyride and escape. I’ve got news for you, kid: There is no escape. There’s only pain. And you can never outrun it; no matter what you do, no matter where you go.”

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Into the Wild (Christopher McCandless)

Scene: Chris is talking about life in general.

Chris: “I read somewhere how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong. But to feel strong.”

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The Big Bang Theory (Howard Wolowitz)

Episode: S3.04 The Pirate Solution
Scene: Howard interrupts Leonard and Penny watching a movie and invites himself to join them.

Howard: “So, what are we watching? Sex and the City? Yikes!”
Penny: “Hey… I happen to love this movie.”
Howard: “Fine, let’s watch it. Maybe all our periods will synchronize.”

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Heroes (Aron Malsky)

Episode: S1.14 Distractions
Scene: Aron Malsky, the lawyer of mobster Linderman enters the prison cell of Niki.

Aron: “You’re going home.”
Niki: “That’s not possible.”
Aron: “Oh, that’s more than possible. The charges against you have been dropped Mrs. Sanders.”
Niki: “What?”
Aron: “The D.A. threw out the entire case.”
Niki: “That can’t happen. I killed people!”
Aron: “Well, the state of Nevada isn’t so sure about that anymore. It seems a rather terrible gentleman on death row confessed to all the crimes you’re accused of. D.N.A. evidence backed up everything. Wonderful system, isn’t it? As far as they’re concerned, justice has been served.”

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Heroes (Mohinder Suresh)

Episode: S1.01 Genisis
Scene: Mohinder holds a lecture in front off his class.

Mohinder: “Man is a narcissistic species by nature. We have colonized the four corners of our tiny planet. But we are not the pinnacle of so called evolution. That honor belongs to the lowly cockroach. Capable of living for months without food; Remaining alive headless for weeks at a time; Resistant to radiation. If God has indeed created himself in his own image, then I submit to you that God is a cockroach.”

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The Big Bang Theory (Sheldon Cooper)

Episode: S3.03 The Gothowitz Deviation
Scene: Leonard tries to persuade Sheldon to be nice to Penny instead of fighting with her all the time.

Leonard: “I’m just saying you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.”
Sheldon: “You can catch even more flies with manure. What’s your point?”

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Seven Years in Tibet (Heinrich Harrer)

Scene: Heinrich is sitting in prison and tries to write a letter to his wife back home.

Heinrich: “If only my hand could express, what is in my heart.”

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Coupling (Jeff Murdoch)

Episode: S3.03 Unconditional Sex
Scene: Jeff’s coworker Wilma tries to seduce him and he’s telling her about his girlfriend.

Wilma: “She really does exist this girlfriend?”
Jeff: “Oh, oh yeah. She exists. She’s very much an existing person. She’s got tons of existence… Well, not too much of existence. I don’t mean she’s huge or anything. She’s somewhere between completely imaginary and a truck; if you can picture that.”

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Coupling (Jeff Murdoch)

Episode: S01.05 The Girl With The Two Breasts
Scene: Steve, Patrick and Jeff are talking about women and their breasts.

Jeff: “Do you know what would be the best way to wipe out all of human kind if you were a space alien with a special kind of mind-ray? Make all women telepathic! Because if they suddenly found out about the kind of stuff that goes on in our heads they would kill us all on the spot. Men are not people… we are disgustoids in human form.”

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Serenity (Malcom Reynolds)

Scene: Mal teaching River about being captain and handling a spaceship. (Last Dialog of the Movie)

Mal: “But it ain’t all buttons and charts, little albatross. You know what the first rule of flying is? Well I suppose you do since you already know what I’m about to say.”
River: “I do. But I like to hear you say it.”
Mal: “Love… You can know all the math in the ‘Verse, but take a boat in the air you don’t love, she’ll shake you off just as sure as the turning of worlds. Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down, tells you she’s hurting ‘fore she keens. Makes her home.”

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firefly (Zoë Washburne)

Episode: S01.14 Objects in Space
Scene: The crew is talking about River, her psychic abilities and if she’s a threat to them.

Wash: “Psychic though? That sounds like something out of science-fiction.”
Zoë: “We live in a spaceship, dear.”

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Entourage (Ari Gold)

Episode: S05.11 Play’n with Fire
Scene: Vince got fired by a german director and Ari arrives at the set to get him back in.

Ari: “Listen! Take a deep breath and relax. It’s all gonna be fine”
Eric: “How?”
Ari: “Because the Jew has arrived and he doesn’t like Germans.”

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Entourage (Ari Gold)

Episode: S03.06 Three’s company
Scene: Ari is trying to get Vince on the phone but he refuses to talk with him until he gets his brother Johnny a job. Lloyd is trying to get Vince on the phone anyway.

Ari: “Lloyd, do you have Vince?”
Lloyd: “No, I have Drama, and he says he’s been authorized to tell you that Vince will not speak to you until he, Drama, has a job.”
Ari: “Really?”
Lloyd: “Really!”
Ari: “Really?!”
Ari (enters the conference room): “People. Staff meeting has been canceled. You all have one goal today, to get Vincent Chase’s brother, Johnny Chase, a job. Any job… I don’t care if it’s a porn shoot in which he is being gang-raped by a gaggle of silverbacked apes. If there are cameras rolling, everybody wins. Ten grand to anyone who can deliver this to me. Today!.”

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Entourage (Billy Walsh)

Episode: S04.02 The First Cut is the Deepest
Scene: Vince and Eric are entering the cut-studio from Billy and seeing his film reels.

Eric: “Wow! Cuttin’ the old-fashioned way, heh?”
Billy: “Why fuck a woman with a vibrator when you got a dick, right suit?”

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firefly (River Tam)

Episode: S01.07 Jaynestown
Scene: River is sitting in the kitchen and tries to correct the Bible.

Shepard Book: “What are you doing sweetheart?”
River: “Fixing the Bible.”
Book (panics): “I…. ehm… what?!”
River: “Bible’s broken. Contradictions, false logistics… doesn’t make sense.”
Book: “No, no… you… you… you can’t!”
River: “So we’ll integrate non-progressional evolution theory with God’s creation of Eden. Eleven inherent metaphoric parallels are already there. Eleven. Important number. Prime number. One goes into the house of eleven, eleven times, but always comes out one. Noah’s ark is a problem.”
Book: “Really?”
River (ripping out a page): “We’ll have to call it early quantum state phenomenon. Only way to fit 5000 species of mammal on the same boat.”

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firefly (Dr. Simon Tam)

Episode: S01.07 Jaynestown
Scene: Jayne took Simons medic room apart because he searched for some tape.

Simon: “What happened in here?”
Jayne: “I needed some tape.”
Simon: “So you had to tear my infirmary apart?”
Jayne: “Apperently!”
Simon: “My God. Your like a trained ape… without the training.”

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firefly (Malcom Reynolds)

Episode: S01.01 Serinity
Scene: Mal offered Simon and his sister River to stay on the Serinity until they found a safe place to hide.

Simon: “I’m trying to put this as delicately as I can. How do I know you won’t kill me in my sleep?”
Mal: “You don’t know me son. So let me explain this to you once: If I ever kill you, you’ll be awake, you’ll be facing me, and you’ll be armed.”